To Past Me,

Well, what can I really say. You’ve been through so much this year it’s hard to sum up in one letter my sentiments to you exactly. So, if you will allow me (you kind of have to because your respect for elders hasn’t changed, by the way), I’d like to address to you, past me, multiple letters. Try to sit through them all.

To Past Me when you first stepped upon the AHS campus,

Hey! It’s the first day of school and you’re kind of lost. Your eyes scan the expansive campus as they search for meaning behind the walls. You lock eye contact with anyone you can find, and you try your best to guess their background, making connections before you’ve ever exchanged a single word. People brush past you in the halls, toting heavy backpacks, bright water bottles, and sporting… sandals? You chuckle as you realize your toes have the chance to be free. Yes. You are free now. You are free to create your own path, to blaze a trail no one has walked before, because you, you are unique. You are unlike anyone who has ever stepped foot on campus because you are passionate. You are driven. You are excited to see what this school holds for you. You are thrilled to get involved and become a lasting student on campus. You, are ready to take on the world. And so, with your backpack pulling at your shoulders, holding everything dear to you, you begin your first day of school. I wish I could tell you how immensely proud of you I am. You could’ve given up right there and then, on you, on me, on us, but you decide that high school will be some of the best four years of your life, and you decide to act on it. You decide that high school is your time to shine.

To Past Me when you got your first C,

Wow. Yup. High school is nowhere close to as easy as middle school was. You are feeling down, feeling like you’re worthless, that you have failed. Frankly, you have. You weren’t prepared; you didn’t study enough, and you didn’t try your best. That’s probably not the best thing to tell you. However, looking back, I thank you. I thank you for making those mistakes so that you can grow as an individual, so that you can learn from your mistakes and become a more studious person. While you may receive many more C’s throughout this year, know that your experience affected us for months to come. You made us stronger, smarter, and harder working, and now you know that you have to work hard for your results.

To Past Me when you got elected for ASB and Homecoming Court,

Now, now, I know you’re shocked that anyone, anyone would pick our ogre looking face to represent them for anything, but be proud. You’ve done well, buddy. I’m elated to tell you that in the months ahead of you, you will become an extremely hard working ASB member and that you’ll make your class proud. I’m so proud that you can call yourself Freshman Secretary because you’ve deserved it. Congrats.

To Past Me when you finished your first finals week,

You’ve made it! Hours upon hours of studying during dead week, almost tearing your hair out, and too many emotional breakdowns to count later, you have bubbled in your last question on a Scantron, suddenly free from school’s shackles. Your first ⅛ of high school is over, but your battle is not. I hope you never lose that flame that inspired you to spend time you’ll never get back to clutching those grades. Only 7 more finals weeks to go.

To Past Me that time you sat on the steps of A building for an hour at night streaming tears,

You know what I’m talking about. At this time, there’s probably nothing I can say or do to lift your spirits except: it gets better. I know at the time, it seems like there’s nothing worse in the world and that everything is going wrong. I know that. However, time heals all wounds, and with the passing of time, your pain will be healed too. Looking back, I still know and understand deeply why you broke down, and you are completely within your right. At the time, you deserved so much more, and I apologize that that wasn’t recognized. Please, know that you are hardworking, you are validated, you are wanted, you are loved. As your eyes become depleted of tears, remember that you are a strong and independent individual, and you deserved so much more. However, as you finish crying, a friend will come up to you. She will keep you comforted and help you feel loved in a time when you’re lacking it. She will understand the needs of someone who is in pain and instead of trying to comfort you with meaningless rhetoric, she will sit by you, reminding you that should your time come, she will be there for you. She will tell you stories of her downfalls and point out that everyone has their ups and downs. As some time passes, she will take you home in her little red convertible with the top down. The wind will dance in your hair as you realize that despite this traumatic experience, you will always have friends and people around you who love you and care about you to lift you back up. Look around you, please. Look around you and appreciate the people who are there for you, because you are amazing.

To Past Me,

This past year has been filled with ups and downs. You’ve been through more than I could possibly imagine. Since the beginning of the year, you’d be glad to know that you have evolved into an individual who is caring, hardworking, loud, personable, experienced, with a steely resolve. This past year has shaped you into a more mature person and throughout the year you will learn from your experiences and finally, me. I am the product of your hard work and determination and for that I will be forever grateful. As you continue throughout the year, love yourself. I know that you definitely struggle with self-esteem and honestly, I still do. However, love yourself despite all. Embrace the fact that you deserve so much and that you are a strong, independent person. As I said earlier, recognize the amazing people in your life and appreciate how they will forever and always be there for you. I know I’ve taken up so much of your time that you’re probably not reading anymore, but appreciate the time you have. This is one of the single cheesiest things I’ve heard growing up, yet I’m going to say it once more. Time flies past you so quickly. It seems like the first day of school was just two days ago when you strapped on your backpack ready to take on the world. It is nearing the last day of school soon, and I’m ready to strap on the caffeine and take on a fat nap. So please, appreciate all the amazing, fun, wholesome, and unforgettable memories you make with the people around you because you’re going to be sophomores soon. Thanks for everything.

Love,

You