As kids, we were often told that there was a right way to do things. The biggest criticism I always received was that I held my pencil the “wrong” way. Teachers, family, and friends alike told me that holding my pencil this way was the reason for my messy handwriting, even though it looked much neater than the handwriting of my peers. In fact, I tried desperately to change my grip, only to watch my neat strokes turn into jagged scribbles. I was often forced to pretend to write with proper grip in front of my teachers to avoid punishment, switching back to what I was comfortable with the moment they turned their backs.

It wasn’t until middle school that I learned about the four common pencil grasps: the dynamic and lateral tripod and the dynamic and lateral quadrupod. Everybody constantly told me that the “right” way was the dynamic tripod, while I used the lateral tripod. Although it’s true that the dynamic tripod is the most efficient, there isn’t really a wrong way amongst these four. I felt as if a huge pressure had been taken off my chest.

This led to a massive revelation. Maybe there wasn’t always a “right” way to do things. Maybe what we thought was “right” was just better. Maybe we were led to think that something was “right” simply because it was the most popular method. In fact, the definition of right is “morally good, justified, or acceptable”. Nowhere in there does it say that “right” necessitates “best”.

In some situations, right and wrong are very distinct. For example, intentional murder without provocation is universally agreed to be wrong. However, the line between right and wrong can often be fuzzy. Is there a right way to draw a horse? What about eating a burger?

There are lots of articles on the internet describing the right way to eat pizza, sleep, or even drink water. In these situations, there may be ways that are wrong because they are harmful to you. Sleeping in the wrong position can lead to back problems; drinking too much water at a time can kill you. However, if you’re achieving your goal and nothing bad comes out of your process, can that really be considered wrong?

I personally feel that in many situations, there isn’t only one right way of doing things. However, many people find it easier to label the most convenient way as the “right” way, making every other method wrong. This can be extremely stressful. I personally felt like a criminal every time I wrote anything because I was using the “wrong” pencil grasp.

Now, some people may ask, “Well, if there’s a better method, why don’t you use that?” For me, it was usually due to habit or just personal preference. It’s hard to argue against scientific research or studies, but I often found that the best ways just didn’t seem to click with me.

In the end, I think it’s important to realize that there isn’t always one right way of doing things. Right and wrong is a spectrum, and it’s perfectly acceptable to be in a lonely area of it.